And the plot thickens

Well, apparently my co-worker TJ lied because the visibility is now about a mile. I can feel my lungs turning black. Flop on floor like a spoiled child.

Cough, save me, cough

Hello, Friends.

In case you've been in a box and haven't heard, Northern California is ablaze. I predicted it. Just not this soon. Last weekend or so there was sort of a lightning storm, the proverbial kick-you-while-your-down on top of high temperatures, winds and draught. When last I heard there were something like 500 fires up here, none in my neck of the woods, thankfully. We are, however getting some serious smoke, making me feel thoroughly claustrophobic. This was Monday:

Bad. Visibility: about 4 miles.

This was yesterday:

This is the same view as the first picture above

Horrible. Visibility: about ridiculous.

That isn't fog my dears, that's smoke. It's so thick that it changed the temperature to moderately cool with a breeze, which made everyone want to open their windows only to get a slap in the face of wheeze, eye water and sneeze. Thanks, I appreciate that.

It's quite a bit better today and a co-worker says that it should be even better by tomorrow, cross fingers.

On the coffee front, I'm just barely starting to kick butt. More of a girly shove. I can tell you, though, I make a mean scrambled egg for our breakfast croissants. Boo ya! Fist pump!

Also! Something moderately exciting. I may have an internship with a photographer! Wahoo! Photography isn't technically my thing, but I happen to like it, also, where there's photography there's Photoshop which is my thing. HAPPY SCREAM!

I can't think of any more agonized titles to give my computerless posts

I've opted for the library.

So, I've started my job working as a barrista. I smell of coffee and liquid heaven. Do you know what this means? Do you?! Money for a new computer! It's only a matter of time my friends.

I'm learning how to make coffee and let me tell you, I stink. I made myself a latte today and..hhh...I'll get better. Oh, I kick butt at pouring, though.

Today we had portraits done for our church directory. Now, I don't want to toot my own horn here, but I'm feeling rather photogenic today. Or so the Olan Mills guy said. Of course, all he's really concerned with is getting us to buy prints. Sob.

I don't have to work tomorrow or probably the next day so I may brave the 95er and the dial-up at home. I'll see about posting something interesting. Sometimes, I think about intentionally causing an event just so I can post about it. Maybe I'll stand up in church tomorrow and scream, "Hallelujah!" just to see what happens.

RIP Computer (until we get it fixed)

Yes, as my previous, rather vague post said, my computer died. I knew this day would come, but I just wasn't prepared for it as soon as this. I am now forced to either, 1) go to the public library and use their fecal-ridden computers or 2) stay home and "use" our (no joke) Windows 95 emergency computer. 95. Windows. Dial-up. I was 9 years old when it was a glimmer in Microsoft's eye. It is, however, running far better than my non-running laptop so who am I to complain? All this means is that I have to be a little more goal-oriented and structured when I go online. This could be good. Also, it's forcing me to get off my behind and do something constructive. I've taken up watercolor! I'm madly in love. It was a whirlwind engagement ending in a quickie Vegas wedding.

So to end this post I shall tell you a little story: I just came from Target where I acquired the munchies. I wandered to the popcorn section because I've been craving it lately and there's been nary a kernel in our pantry for quite some time. I happened to glance to my right only to see not one, but two ripped open, half eaten doughnut boxes. Now correct me if I'm wrong, but you have to be pretty low on the social ladder if you have to steal chocolate Hostess doughnuts and then stuff them behind the 100 Calorie Popcorn. That's like a step above stealing candy from babies and a step below shoving popcorn behind the toilet paper, somthing I did when I realized I wanted Chex Mix more. Hhhh...what is this country coming to?

It's dead.

*sob*

Sorry for not being around as much, friends. My computer has finally decided to abandon ship and it is only by the grace of God that I'm typing this now. You see, the power cord has stopped working under any normal circumstances and now only occasionally works while I grip it in one hand and stretch it mightily across the keyboard, effectively eliminating all practical use of typing on said laptop. "O's" are especially painful.

Let's make a list, shall we?
Battery: effectively, dead
Overheats: always
CD/DVD drive: non-functioning
Power cord: shot (which when coupled with #2 turns out to be rather problematic)

So while I'm plotting to rip off an Apple store, I leave you with this, the stuff of my nightmares (and not-so-very implausible):

You cook, I'll watch

I've been sort of obsessed with cooking lately. Less me actually cooking, more watching other people do it. It all started when I watched "Kitchen Nightmares" which progressed to "Top Chef" which moved to "Hell's Kitchen" and "Rachel Ray." As it stands it's sort of superficial but I can feel myself teetering on the edge of the culinary obscure. Heaven help us if I ever actually get the FoodNetwork.

Also, I've gained a new appreciation for cheese. I know, it's a little weird. But I've always sort of hated cheese. As we speak I'm eating some sheep cheese (it smells like the bolling alley). My mom and I are both a little confused, though, as to how exactly one milks a sheep.

No knitting or art news lately. I'm sorry. I'm working on it, really.

pass the popcorn, please

So, I'm really excited about the new "WALL-E" movie. Maybe not so much for the movie itself (although I think it looks pretty cute), but maybe more that I can see myself working on a movie like that some day and being proud of it. The worst thing I can imagine is to sell my soul for a job I hate and can't be proud of the work it produces. But anyway, about the movie. Mom said that she would treat me to the movies and maybe buy me my own popcorn and soda. YES! Extra butter on that popcorn, please.

Yeah, the video isn't really 11 minutes long, don't worry.

deep, cleansing breath

I consider myself a generally pessimistic person. Well, maybe not pessimistic, perhaps...realistic, sarcastic? I try my hardest never to bring those thoughts and feelings to this blog (unless it gets in the way of my biting-good wit.) but today it is especially hard. I'm resisting the urge to dump all of my "problems" on you, dear readers, but who does that benefit? No one, really.

I do have some good news though: I got a job! A real job, working at Ken's new coffee shop. Wahoo! He's going to call me next week. It's such a cozy little shop with a friendly atmosphere and a soon-to-be piano (which I have been recruited to play, cringe) and a bookshelf with some classics for your reading pleasure (my idea: thank you, thank you).

I'm scheming ideas for some new art and have a couple of sources of inspiration. If I can get around to cleaning out my room, perhaps I can start on them.

Oh yeah...

Oh, and I forgot to gloat: yesterday was my birthday. I'm a grown up 22 years old and ready to conquer the world. Look out!

Direction! I need you!

I'm tired of being unemployed, sleeping in, knitting all day and watching TV until my eyes glaze over. There's only a certain lack of accomplishment (and money) one can take.

For the past couple of days I've been hanging out with a friend from church, catching up, talking about art and God and life in general. It has been sort of rejuvenating. The child has 4 (!) internships with graphic design companies and I'm starting to get jealous. I'm not exactly looking into a graphic design career, but good grief. She has inspired me to get my behind in gear. I have re-evaluated my goals and here's the new and improved list:

1) Get a job
2) Save every penny for:
a) A Mac
b) Adobe Creative Suite
3) Cut back on expensive coffee addiction (*cringe*, *die*)

That's it. By the end of the summer I will be blogging at you with my brand new Mac. Just you wait.